324 吃地沟油长大的骚年(1 / 2)

“老倌儿,看到我你就跑什么?”

太上老君一撇嘴,在心底把已知的脏话一口气全部倒了出来。正要走,却被人死死的拉住。

回头看竟是树神晃晃悠悠的走了过来,他头顶着几颗熟透的果实,手捂着肚子嗨嗨呦呦地道:“太上祖师,救命啊。”

太上老君道:“你这是怎么了?”

“他……”

树神原本暗淡的眸子突然似要喷出火来,他一指梅寻,正要道明原委,却被梅寻抬手摘掉了他头上的一颗果子。

“哎哟哟,疼死我了……哎呦呦……你!”

梅寻将果实咬在嘴里,抬手又摘下两颗,分别丢给太上老君和凌小雪。

“哎呦呦,哎呦呦……”树神疼的蹲在地上直嗨呦。

太上老君一脸茫然的看看凌小雪,又看看梅寻,越看这家伙就越觉得没人性。

梅寻张口就咬了一口,笑嘻嘻地道:“嗯,味道真的不错哦,你尝尝。”

凌小雪满脸的嫌弃,正要随手给扔了,可这时就听树神说道:“我这果实三千年一成熟,虽比不上王母娘娘的蟠桃,却也不是凡品,凡人吃了百病全消,修士吃了也会提高一个阶位……”

他还要继续吹嘘,气的太上老君直翻白眼,“别说了,再TM说下去,你头顶上的果实就一颗不剩了,没看你眼前站的是什么货色吗?TM眼珠子都绿了。”

树神赶紧闭嘴,然后拼劲全力隐藏仅剩下为数不多的几颗果实。

凌小雪也细心的擦拭,然后张口慢慢的品尝。

说实话,没什么味道,就是水分挺足的。

梅寻一口气吃完,顿时觉得神清气爽,他色狼看美女的眼神又盯上了太上老君手中的那颗果实。

太上老君一阵惊慌,张口就拼命的咬,完全没有神该有的矜持。

梅寻鄙夷道:“你那么多仙丹,至于么?”

太上老君道:“我不为别的,就是单纯的不想给你。”

梅寻撸胳膊挽袖子叫嚣,“不服碰一碰啊。”

“我怕你啊,小毛崽子。”

两人正要动手,却听背后传来凌小雪一声痛呼,梅寻赶忙回头,却见凌小雪手捂着肚子蹲在了地上,一副痛苦难忍的模样。

“小雪!”梅寻急忙上前,双手捏住她的玉肩,满脸紧张地道:“小雪,你怎么了?”

“肚子好痛。”

“怎么会这样?”

“哎呦!”

梅寻回身,却见太上老君也捂着肚子一脸痛苦的表情,“老倌儿,你别碰瓷儿啊。”

“谁装是你儿子。”

看这样子还真不是装的,不然奥斯卡影帝就是太上老君的啦。

最后,梅寻看向了树神。

树神吓得一个激灵,急忙摆手道:“跟我可没关系,你也吃了,为什么你没事?”

太上老君道:“小毛崽子你太阴险了,为了让我上当,竟然不顾及自己的同伴,你真是太狠毒了。”

“我没有。”梅寻紧张的看向凌小雪,实在担心她也会这么想。

凌小雪满头大汗,眼看着疼痛正在一步步加重,梅寻转身来到太上老君的面前,道:“张嘴。”

太上老君不止没有张嘴,反而闭的更紧了,就算梅寻捏住他的下巴,他也始终不松口。

梅寻急道:“我这里有解药。”

太上老君强忍着腹痛,拼命的摇头,“你TM真有解药会先记着我?去你M的吧。”

梅寻没有办法,来到凌小雪的面前,道:“小雪,张开嘴。”

凌小雪满脸羞红,虽也是极不情愿,但腹痛难忍,也就不再矜持。

梅寻将食指直接伸进了凌小雪的口中,凌小雪一阵恶心,一脚将他踹开,“你洗手了吗你?”

梅寻一脸无辜地道:“的确不干净,刚刚尿手上没洗。”

“呕~~~~~~”

凌小雪直接就吐了,太上老君也不例外。

等两人吐完,正要对梅寻实施围攻,梅寻却早已笑嘻嘻的抱头等着了,这让两人大出意料之外。

“都吃了为什么就你没事?是不是你动的手脚耍我们?”

梅寻无奈的摊摊手,“我是吃地沟油长大的,一般毒素早就免疫了。”

“我信了你的邪,给我揍他。”

两人上前,毫不客气的对其一顿暴揍。

树神却在一旁瘫软下去,“太上祖师,先救救小老儿吧。”

太上老君随手丢给他一枚金丹,道:“快滚开,别妨碍老子打人。”

凌小雪看着气势汹汹,其实收着力道呢,太上老君却不然,这厮那是真下家伙啊,就差直接拿刀砍了。

“老登,你真打啊!”

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